Rough Times

Things had been quite rough lately.. this past one week that is..

I think I'm coping quite well.. I'm still surviving until this day

I've walked through rocky roads

And the storm passed me by

It aint easy, but I'm still here

I was struck by a lightening during my journey

It shocked me

It hurts as well,

But it's part of the journey

I'm trying to forget

Trying to let go

Trying to move on

Trying to be happy for whoever

Trying to be happy for myself

I'm alright... just alright

I want to cry

I want to scream

I want to give up

I even want to die sometimes..

This journey is tough

I got to be tough as well

I can do it!!! I can do it!!!

I have to be strong..

Strong so I won't be shaken

I don't know who understands what I'm going through

Whoever does, they'll know what I'm talking about.

Obstacles

There is an old legend of a benevolent king who had his men place a great heavy stone on a certain roadway over which all his subjects would have to travel. He then hid himself to see who would try to remove the stone. No one stopped to try to remove the stone, but all worked their way around it, loudly blaming the king for not keeping the roadway clear. Finally, a poor peasant farmer on his way to town with a load of vegetables which he hoped to sell in the marketplace came to the blocked roadway. He laid down his load and with considerable effort and loss of time managed to move the great stone to the side of the roadway. Then, turning to leave, he spied a purse which had been under the stone. He opened the purse and found it to be filled with pieces of gold, with a note from the king indicating that it was all to be the property of the one who would remove the stone.

We all face obstacles and difficulties in life and have two options on how to handle them. We can either go around them and let another deal with them, or we can face them head-on and overcome them. As the peasant was rewarded for his work, we as Christians will be rewarded for persevering through the obstacles which try to hinder us.

"You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God you will receive what he has promised." Hebrews 10:36

After speaking about making a change, it reminds me of this story. Basically, all these things are what I'm going through right now. Obstacles, dealing with things, making a change etc etc. Well, this illustration has blessed me, and I hope it can bless many more =D I give the credit to one of my very good friend. You know who you are. GBU!

Making A Change

Making a change is never easy. To even think about making a change requires a lot of thinking, time, and effort. Currently, I've just decided to change one thing about my life. I never really thought of doing it, but now I've decided. I don't know whether I will succeed or not, coz it requires a lot of strength from deep inside me. To tell you the truth, I'm not a strong person at all. I'm really weak at a lot of things, esp having self-control. It's very hard for me to resist temptation and I easily fall. Well, anyway, I just pray to God to give me strength so I can cope with everything. I know I will have to overcome many obstacles and I know many temptations will come right infront of me. I have fallen many times, but I'm still here walking in the same road, going through the same journey, and trying my best to get up and continue on with this journey of life.

I really hate walking in rocky road, but I'm sure I'm not the only one. I believe everyone goes through tough times in their life, and everyone walks in rocky road. I know I'm not alone. We all have problems.

Well, anyway back to the topic change, I believe no matter how many times people tell you to change, if deep inside you still reject to do so, then it will never happen. Making a change is definitely a big step. Of course, making a change is done in order to achieve a better result. We all want to change our bad habits, we all want to change to be a better person.

For me personally, many people have told me to change this one thing about me. Even I think many of my good friends are tired of me by now. Right now, I don't even bother telling them things anymore, coz they're probably tired of me not changing. Well, you know, some people are just stronger than me and they can change sooner than me. But for me, it takes a longggggg time to change. Actually, take that back. Yes, it does takes a long time for me to change.. but it's even longer for me to even just make the decision to change. But, thank God, now I have decide that. Oh, and also many times, even though I've decided to change, I fell into temptations and took back my decision. Yes, I know it's bad. But as I told you, I'm not that strong. But I'm learning to be. This time I'm pretty serious about the change that I'm making. Hopefully with the strength from God, I can completely make that change, and win from it. AMEN!

IKEA trip

Well today, after we went to Indo Embassy to renew my passport, we decided to go to IKEA... Well, I hvnt been there for a while now,, a few years that is.. Soo.. we had lunch that is - meetball n chips - very intersting indeed.

After that.. we looked around.. well, I've been thinking to do some re-decoration in my room, since I'm gna live here for at least the next 3.5 years. I might as well make it nice and cozy.

So right now, my room is very plain dull n boring! seriously.. well messy as well =p but yeah, hopefully I can finish tidying my room before the holiday ends. So here are the furnitures in my room right now

1. Bed

2. Chest drawer

yeahhh.. THATS ALL! sooooo boring hey! So after having a look around in IKEA.. I got some ideas on what to do with my room. Well, I might do some re-positioning on some furnitures. Anywayyy,, I really really 100x do want my room to look like the room in IKEA. I personally LOVEE and ADOREEE small bedrooms and houses as well. I think it's very cozy, pack, and just simply NICE! So there were a few sample of small bedrooms in IKEA that I loveeeeee soo much! And just wished that my room could look like that. I mean, if I buy that whole set, it will cost a fortune, plus I'm sure my parents wont be willing to pay for it! hahahha.. so bad luck jude! Maybe next time, when I have my own house, or when I work full time, I can probably afford to buy a whole new set of furnitures. hahahah..

So for now, I'm just gna move some furnitures from my sister's room to my room.. hahaha.. that is.. a bedside table, a desk, a chair, and maybe I'll add a shelf. I'm just gna use what's available.. hahaha.. and be satisfied with it. Well, that's all for now. I'm going to put that one of the cool bedrrom that I saw in IKEA.

~ study break ~

Well, finally I can have some rest.. after waking up at 7 for nearly everyday! So, it's the first day of study break.. and yes.. no study just yet! well, I was planning to study since like yesterday, but that never happened. hahahha.. as always.. procrastinating is what I'm doing. Anyway.. let's skip this boring talk.. I made a to do list for this study break.

1. STUDY! derrr... obviously.. need to catch up on nearly all my subjects.. hahaa.. been slacking a lot.. well not a lot.. just all the time.. hahahah

2. CLEAN MY ROOM! yeahhh.. that's right! it is suchh a mess now.. well not now.. I mean it has been a mess since like the first time I move into this house.. hahahaha.. seriously.. I think I really should clean it this time whilst I got the time

3. LEARN TO DRIVE! yesssss.. I've been saying that since the start of the year! hahaha.. well I got my indo license now.. but I actually forgot how to drive now, since I havnt practise for hmm let see.. 8 months? hahahha.. I kept saying.. well, when my dad is here.. then I'll practise..butt that never happened either! I'm so bad at getting things done..well hopefully this time I can really get my L plate..

4. SORT OUT MY CLOTHES! hmm.. yeahh.. well recently I have a new set of clothes coming into my wardrobe.. plusss there's actually heapz of clothes that I don't use anymore. Either.. it's out of date, doesn't fit anymore, or I just don't like it anymore. So yeah, I might get rid of those unused one. coz my wardrobe doesn't fit anymore clothes! hahaha..

5. LEARN A PIANO PIECE! well I doubt I can get this done.. hahaha.. seriously.. well, currently I'm in love with this classical piece " Humoresque Op 101 No 7 " by Antonin Dvorak. It's a really well known piece and very nice indeed! I printed out the music sheet and tried to learn it today.. hahaha so hard though! I survived to learn half a page of the piece.. hahahha.. so bad lah.. I hvnt practise my piano for so long! I kinda miss it though.. ahhaha.. it's so nice when you can play classical piano.

Well, that's all.. I don't know whether I'll get them done during this 1 week holiday, but I'll try my best.

I wish I could.. I wish you would.. I will always..

I wish I could.. talk to you

I wish I could.. be with you

I wish I could.. be the one you love

I wish I could.. be your bestfriend

I wish I could.. share my thoughts

I wish I could.. express my feelings

I wish I could.. escape my misery

I wish I could.. be happy

I wish I could.. be who I am

I wish you would.. talk to me

I wish you would.. listen to me

I wish you would.. be interested in me

I wish you would.. ask how do I do

I wish you would.. care about me more

I wish you would.. always be nice

I wish you would.. always be there

I will always.. be there for you

I will always.. wait for you

I will always.. listen to you

I will always.. obey you

I will always.. care about you

I will always.. love you

A.S World

Okay, so this year is a special year. Well, that is because it's my first year in uni! It marks a new beginning in my life, coz I'm starting something new. Anyway, one semester has passed, and I guess it has been pretty much kewl. There's struggle here and there, esp during exams, as well as the every week online quizes.. but I managed to cope with everything. What I love the most is I met new wonderful people in uni. Yeah, they're my AS friends. After knowing them for half a year, here's a description that I can come up with..

Fran - So here comes the genius of all. (Background : Indo) just like me, anyway I'd say that Fran is the smartest out of all of us, the most hardworking one, never sleeps in class, even when it comes to boring lectures. Her eyes would still be wide awake and her brain would function very well. She's one of the nicest one as well =D

Shan - The Calc Genius! yeah.. that's her. A loyal friend as well. She was there to help me during my chicken pox time! ain't afraid of getting chicken pox from me.. hahaha.. when I asked her.. r u sure u want to drop me? " yeah i'm not gna let u catch the bus, that's what friends are for" awwww.. her house is pretty close to mine as well, so I always get a lift from her =D thanks girll..! (Background : China)

Wan - Here comes the crazy girl with wild imagination. Often is high.. even after drinking some non-alcoholic juice.. hahahhaa.. she's the funny one. An animeee drama korean freakkk!! yeahh! no one beats her.. Loves to direct stories.. and create some weird combined story. Well yeah.. That is wan. (Background : Malay)

Joanne - Here comes the ABC girl ( Australian born Chinese ) hahahah.. well known as the quiet one.. but don't get it wrong.. she can be crazy at times. esp when it comes too.. animeeeee.. just like wan! omg.. they can be in their dream world together! hahaha.. she's the smart one as well.. basically everyone is so.. hahaha.. (Background : Hong Kong)

Jude - And here I am.. hahahhaha.. I'm sure everyone would agree.. I'm well known as the laziest slackest one.. hahhahaha.. Always sleeping during lectures. Coz I think It's all boring. I cannot stand.. Nihal, Roger nor Nirmala. hahahahah.. so that's me =D (Background: Indo)

And that's A.S whom I love so much. Our fav past times include Card Games ( big two, cheat, snap), Karaoke, Badminton, Movies, and ofcourse Shopping! We're all different and diverse, but here we are joined together in the acturial world. Can be damn loud at times and crazy nearly all the time.

Here I am

So here I am, sitting right infront of my bestfriend. Yes, my bestfriend, that is my very own laptop. I'm just one ordinary girl living alone at home, where no other living things breathe ( other than trees etc ) That's why my laptop is my bestfriend, because it's the one thing that keeps me alive and well entertained at home. Without it, I'll be bored to death.. probably sleep all day long.

Anyway, I'm not sure why I'm blabbering about my laptop here.. the point is.. It's me again back to blogging. An activity that I used to do 5 years ago. After thinking for quite a while, I thought I might as well do it again. It seems fun anyway. Well, lately it seems that blogging is coming back alive. As a friend told me, it's the "digital era" where you share your thoughts online and digitally. I sometimes wonder why do people blog? After running some discussion moments, I came to this conclusion. People need to share their thoughts. And sometimes an ordinary person ie. your closest friend, can't simply listen to everything in your head. Or you might not feel comfortable telling everything to them. Sometimes you just need to be alone and think about the things around you. About your life, your hopes, dreams, etc. And after a while you'll be surrounded by millions of thoughts running through your head. Then there's this moment where you think, yes I'm lost.. lost within your own thoughts. Then you will feel like you need to share it, so here comes the writing part. Not so sure whether that make sense to you or not, but that is what I think. Here's just an introduction to my blog, enjoy reading the upcoming posts =D