suck it up

there are just some things that u cannot force
no matter how much u tried
or how much u want it
i guess if it's not meant to be then it just won't work

then what happens when that thing is ur life goal?
something that uve been wanting ur whole life
something that u crave
something that uve work hard for
something that u absolutely want

then u know what
suck it up
deal with it

i tried to think so hard
n i cannot think of any solutions
n thats all i can think of

yup fml.

wanna scream wanna shout
want to just go away
escape everything
sadly cant do that

trapped.. so fking damn trapped inside.
hate to be me

nothing has changed

funny how after 3 whole years.. 3 years 2 months and 10 days to be exact nothing has changed. absolutely nothing has changed. the strong attachment ive got towards u has remained to be exactly the same. or even more in that case. why? i don't know. well yes i have to admit i have achieved some sort of effort. our relationship has gotten much closer than before. but.. what does it even mean. i know its false hope, temporary happiness. but i guess temporary happiness is better than no happiness at all. i am still the obsessed me. checking my whatsapp every 2 mins to see when u are online. what u are up to. like a crazy stalker. ofcourse. pls dont ever know or ull freak out. what am i doing? i dont know and i know its stupid useless and worthless. but why i dont stop? i dont know either. i guess im just foolish.