Wow.. I haven't written in here for a long time..
Lots of things happened.. but for now I wanna write about what I'm feeling..
Escaping reality.
I have been trying to escape from reality for this past weeks.. maybe months..
I don't know why.. but I just don't feel like facing the reality
I've been living in my lala land
Where I can relax and feel happy
Watching dramas fills me with fantasy
False hope and comfort
And that't the world I'm living it at the moment..
I know somehow and someday I have to get out of this bubble
I think I'm avoiding it coz I have to much to bear in mind..
First of all, my future..
And so I'm in my last semester..
I can't believe time flies just in a blink of an eye
I remember the confusion I had when I was about to finish high school..
What major should I do? I have to do good in TEE.. this determines my life
I remember having those thoughts
Somehow it's dejavu..
Uni life is ending..
And I have to make another decision as to where I wanna head into..
This time it's bigger and I have to think carefully
Finding work hasn't been easy at all.. I still have to be patient
Or is there something else that I meant to do?
And is that the reason God hasn't given me the best job yet?
Am I suppose to do post grad?
Am I suppose to change course?
I really don't know..
I honestly don't like Actuarial Science
And I don't plan to become an Actuary either
But I don't know what I like..
I don't know what I want..
I don't know what I wanna be..
That's why I'm so confused..
How can I lead my life when I don't even know what I even want?!
I keep thinking and thinking..
And I still can't find the answer yet..
I hope I will find it soon
Secondly, I've been slacking so much that I'm behind all my units
I really need to catch up soon..
Maybe because it's last semester that I don't have any motivation at all
Literally zero.. And it's so bad
I just wanna get it over and done with..
I don't want to do any studies..
Sighhhh... That's why I'm escaping reality..
