It feels like if i post more status updates you just gonna hate me.. Be annoyed.. And wouldnt understand why i do it. You probably think that it's useless, it's not helping, And i shud just let it go. You're too logical and practical. And even if i try to explain, you probably wouldnt even understand.. And lecture me with ur logical mind. I know what is right to do. I dont need anymore lecture on it. I just wish you could bloody understand this feeling. The frustration im going through. The pain.. The depression, just everything. I wish you could understand and do feel sorry for me. Im scared that you'll change your mind, thinking that its best if we dont keep in touch. Im too scared to lose you.. So i hold it back. I hold it back everyday, when i long for you every day, every hour, every minute of the day. I check on your social media, i wanna know what ure up to, staring at my phone like a crazy person. You have turned me into one crazy super mad person. Not being able to be with you is bad enough.. and on top of that, i cant even express my own feelings. This feeling of trap.. Like a soul wanting to escape the body.. Its the worst! It feels like life is so meaningless, like im just trapped. Not knowing what to do. What is right what is wrong.. Theres no one around.. No one to talk to. It feels like im more alone than ever. When tears have just fallen every single day for the past few months. Its just so tiring. So tiring living like this, that i sometimes wanna give up on life. What is there to live for anymore?! When all i ever want is you and only you. I dont need money i dont need luxury. Ive got enough of it. All i want is u. The most impossible thing to get.